Down near the border, where there is no border, between Mexico and Guatemala, I found myself sitting. I was leaning against some kind of tropical tree, facing a circular clearing. Around the outside of the clearing, similar trees were scattered – and beyond them – the jungle wrapped itself nonchalantly about us, like a huge cat. To my right, off a ways, I could see indication of a gold-topped temple pyramid, somewhat overgrown with the lush greenness of this land. I was not interested in the pyramid; I was drawn to the powerful energy of this Circle. To my left, a narrow trail led off into the depths of the vast jungle surrounding us.
Around the Circle sat perhaps a dozen persons in various clothing, suitable for this climate, and seemingly from this area. I sat in my denims, of course. Suddenly, Quetzalcoatl appeared in the center of the Circle, standing and turning slowly to look at each of us. I stared at him, and finally said, “I don’t think I belong in this group, do I?”
And he replied, “Of course you do; this is my group of apprentices, and you are one.” And then he smiled, “Unless you don’t want to be…”
“No…no… I do… thank you… ok.”
Then, to each in turn, he said, “I’m going to lead you to a place for your first Initiation.” And then he led us away, one at a time.
Finally, he called me to follow him down that narrow trail to the left.
We walked for a while, and then stopped. To our left there was a very incredibly ancient remains of, perhaps, a temple or some type of building. Way older than all the ruins previously discovered in this area. It was so overgrown and crushed down, that it was difficult to see it as much more than a Faery barrow.
He said, “Ok. In you go.”
I said, “What I am looking for?”
“Whatever you find,” came the Zen-like response.
“And what will I find?”
“Why, what you are looking for, of course. Now, go in.”
His answers reminded me of the ones Alice got in Wonderland.
I had to crawl into the small opening on hands and knees, and flatten even a little more than that. It was a long narrow tunnel, and would have been dark, but for the small crystals embedded in the earthen walls. They glowed in luminescence - from some inner fire they held in their being. Sparklies. I like sparklies.
After quite a bit of crawling, the tunnel suddenly widened out, and I could actually unfold and stand up. I saw that I was in a grand cavern, shaped like an upside-down bowl. The walls, floor, and overhead rounded ceiling were filled with thousands of brightly glowing crystals. It was beautiful. And awesome. And just filled with Light.
And then, I thought back to the enigmatic answers that Quetzalcoatl had given me. What I was looking for – what I continue to search for – is verification of my having an inner Light. That there is Truth of Light within me. For real. And there it was.
Just as I “grokked” the concept of this mirror image of my inner self, the center of the cavern was filled with a huge brilliant shaft of light – whether rising from the Earthmother’s heart or pouring from the Stars themselves, I couldn’t tell. And it wasn’t just ordinary Light, either. It was white fire Light. It was wolf-star white-fire Light… yes, and definitely Fire. In its midst, stood Quetzalcoatl. He was looking right at me, until I looked up and met his eyes. Then he stretched out his arm, and opened his hand, for me to grab hold of.
Well, I wasn’t quite as sure of myself as I like to think. It’s one thing to imagine doing such daring; it’s quite another to actually for real do it. Patiently, he stood there. And, finally, I did what I knew I was going to do; I just had to get my will stronger than my fear. I reached my hand to hold his, and, as we touched, he pulled me into the Fire Light.
Right up through the fire I went, and just as quickly, I was sitting back under the tree, outside the Circle, where I originally had been. I checked myself to see if I was smoldering, or anything.
Then I noticed that he was standing behind me. He crouched down beside me, and said, “You have passed the first of the purification rites. You can go home now. Return when you are ready for the next one.”
And in the blink of an eye, I was back home.